On, in , and around Mondays: Cyclic

anxiety because he didn't show again... and is giving me the silent treatment.
but then peace, as we cross the WV border with bluegrass blaring on the radio... and a life-giving talk with my sister, ensuring that everything is and will be fine.

a memorial service for a spit-fire hillbilly woman who inspired me to fight... who stood up to a giant and fought for her beloved mountains.
but then guilt, when little one asks to leave because it's making him sad.
we walk around a while and then come back. he joins in chanting, "what would judy do? fight harder!" and stomps his feet. "this IS the year mountaintop removal will end!!"

driving in the dark to the lodge... nestled in the west virginia hills.
a much needed reprieve for both of us.
me, downtrodden, because no matter how much glue i apply, it just won't stick.
because i opened my heart up again... and failed.
him, hopes aroused but unmet.... tears over homework assignments that ended up being tears of a deeper nature. tears over something i can't fix.

but in all this cycle of sadness, anxiety, disappointment, we wake to a sunrise over the deep canyon. blue mountain majesty. bringing peace to a mother and son.
nature is crying out over judy..... nature is crying out over broken things...
because even the rocks and hills will cry out.

and then this verse.... "he will quiet you with his love".

Wine and Secrets...........


..... both poured forth at the table. The corner table with the scent of weeping cherry tree blossoms tinging the air, Ray LaMontagne playing on the laptop... that table in our little, rented room became our confession box.

Whispering into the late evening hours... laughing... sharing our hearts. Nourishment for our aching and weary souls. Burdens revealed and lifted for a sweet, short while.

After being apart for nearly a year and a half, a weekend of bliss with my sister........

Pop-Pop...


when i need to go to town, i go out of my way to drive past your farm..... even though it is not 'on the way'. as i crest the hill, i look down into the valley, and see the yellow farmhouse sitting there with smoke coming out of the chimney, and i imagine you as a boy, running through the yard, playing in the creek.

since you died when i was young, this is my living diary of your life... being able to walk the hills where you walked..... this is how i am coming to know you.... this is how i cling to you.

i have pictures of you asleep on our couch, with me curled up on your chest. my parents always told me how proud you were of me and my sisters.... how much you adored us. i remember you taking me to Druthers when i would visit, for your morning coffee with all the other retirees. we both would order biscuits and gravy, our shared favorite.... and you would brag of all my accomplishments to your friends. i remember proudly sitting by your side, driving around town, in your blue pick-up truck.

sometimes i get out the cards i made for you while you were in the hospital, dying from a disease you should never have had. i don't remember making them, but my mom saved them. i hope my scribbly handwriting and rainbows cheered you a little... or was it a bittersweet offering, reminding you what you had to leave behind? i didn't get to go to your funeral.... my parents thought i was too young, and your neighbor babysat me. she tried to comfort me by giving me kool-aid, and candy.... and she answered all my 7 year old questions about where you were going as best she could.

now that i am in your homeland, i see your eyes everywhere i go.... they are my eyes, too.... the most distinct physical feature that i inherited from you. and i tell my memories of you to my son, as we drive past your homeplace.... and when we frolic in the creek by your brother's house. i tell him, "this is where your great-grandfather played.... this is the house he helped build with his own hands..... he would have adored you". and i watch the grin come over my son's face as he hears those words.... and i know you are still here with me because of it.

love is...... a father who gets up in the middle of the night when his little girl is puking her guts out, and sits with her in his easy chair, holding the bowl, rocking, and whispering words of comfort in her little ears.... who lends a nonjudgmental and consoling ear when she comes to him devastated and heartbroken because of mistakes she has made and poor choices that have left her in desperation.

love is.... a mother who sews little dresses for her daughter's dolls, who snuggles and reads to her even though she has lots of other things to be doing, who praises every accomplishment, no matter how small..... who's there in the room when her daughter is giving birth for the first time to lend encouragement and support.

love is..... a son that wakes up every morning and greets his parents with a big smile and so much excitement for the day, that he can hardly contain it.... who can change his mom's frown to a fit of laughter in a millisecond with something he says..... who tells his mom he loves her and is sorry for upsetting her, even though it was she who unduly lost her temper with him....who loves to serve his mom breakfast in bed on saturday mornings.

love is ...... a friend who shares coffee, laughter, and tears with you.... who 'gets' you like no one else....who tells you 'leave your son here and go home and rest for the day' when you walk to her house sobbing when life circumstances feel like they are too much to bear... someone you know your deepest secrets will always be safe with.

love is.... a God that stoops down to my weaknesses and draws me up to Him and invites me to dance with Him.... who never turns His back on me, even when I turn my back on Him..... who loves me so much that at times, I feel my heart will burst for the knowledge of it.... who rescued me from myself... and who never fails to paint a glorious sunrise or sunset over my mountains just for me.

" And now these three remain: Faith, Hope , and Love... but the greatest of these is Love."

-1 Corinthians 13:13

No Need To Fear........

Sir Laughsalot is here!!!!

Or should I say, Robin Hood? Either way, there was no need to be afraid of this big, green monster we came across at The Maryland Rennaisance Festival , with such a brave companion at my side.

Sir Laughsalot started the day as a knight, but happened across this super cool hat and changed roles for the day. That's the fun of the festival.....both children AND adults get to play make-believe!

Much more to come, but this fair maiden needs her beauty rest after a long weekend of being rescued from ugly green trolls and keeping up with a 5 year-old in Wonderland........

Wordless Wednesday.......
Storytime with Grandma... this photo was taken by my sister when we were all in Carolina for the holidays. I think it speaks for itself.....




For more Wordless Wednesdays go here.....

The Last of a Generation.......
"In all of us there is a hunger, marrow-deep, to know our heritage - to know who we are and where we have come from." -Alex Haley

"You monkeys snuck right past me," she said as she walked up behind us to open the door to her apartment. She ambled up the sidewalk , cane in hand....in her thick coat and knit hat that her mother made. My sister and I had just arrived and didn't see her sitting in her car in the parking lot.

"I was waiting in my car, watching for you."

"For how long?", we asked.

"Since 9 o'clock", she said.

"NORMA!", I said, because I knew it was after 10. "Did you not think we could find our way? It's freezing outside!"

She just grinned at me and unlocked the door to let us all in from the cold.

Norma is my second cousin and lives in Hagerstown, MD. She's the last of my grandfather's generation. She's approaching 90 and is a treasure trove of memories and stories of growing up near my grandfather and her summers spent on his farm.

My sister and I met up in Hagerstown this past weekend for a two-fold purpose.....to see each other one last time before she flies back to her current home in London, and to visit with Norma and record her memories and stories for future generations. My grandfather died when I was pretty young...so her stories are my connection to him...a living diary of their intertwined lives.

Norma is all spunk and personality, as were most of the women on my dad's side of the family. She loves visits from "cousins" and basked in the attention and questions. As she recounted her past, she would often drift off, getting caught up in the memory...often a smile would appear during these moments..or a tear in the eye. She told us of the mischief that would happen on the farm....and of fighting with her sister over Emory Metzger, whom her sister ended up marrying. Her favorite phrase is "Cotton-pickin"...used over and over in regards to people and circumstances.

Norma and her younger sister, Jenny, never married. They lived together most of their life and provided foster care to infants until a home was found for them. We took Norma to her favorite diner for lunch and she pointed to a place in the restaurant where one of her foster babies found his "forever family"...a couple that saw him as they were having dinner and became enamored with him, eventually adopting him. We chauffeured her around town as she pointed out places that were near and dear to her...giving me driving directions such as "Stay on this road until you get somewhere else".....

At the end of a wonderful day spent together, we hugged and kissed, and her parting words were, "I love you, monkeys!" A day to be cherished.... and stories to be passed down to the next generation so that the "living" history of our family will be preserved and told for years to come....

(photos courtesy of my sis' )

Family time........ the best part of the holidays was getting to see all of my family. We are spread out all over the East coast...me being the farthest north- my oldest sister being the farthest south, and another sister and my parents spread out in between. My younger sister lives across the ocean in London. We are a very close family and it's hard being so far apart and not getting to see each other often. We try to all go to my parent's home every other Christmas, which ensures that we'll all get to be together at least every two years.

My dad was an only child and only one of my mom's brothers had a child, so we didn't have lots of cousins and extended family growing up. But now, between my sisters and I, there are 7 grandkids.... so Sirlaughsalot has lots of cousins and enjoys his time with them tremendously. This Christmas was extra special because he's now of the age where he's making memories...... and I'm sure he will cherish the 3 weeks he had with all his extended family.

1. Auntie and niece....who was about to throw up in my car....unbeknownst to me

when I took the photo. She was the first to get the plague.......

2. Sir Laughsalot and cousins enjoying treats from the candy shop.

3. Cousin Superboy chowing down during our day out at a local village

4. Girls day out..... my mom, my younger sister, and me

5. The littlest cuz' on the block... BabySkylark

How do you get a little peace and quiet with 7 kids all staying in a small one bedroom cabin? Put in the movie "Cars"....... I'm not usually one to pacify kids with TV, but sometimes circumstances dictate a little leniancy and flexibility.

My parents recently sold their 5 bedroom house and are renting a small cabin in the same cove. And, it just so happens that this Christmas the whole family was able to make it to the Carolinas for the holidays, which is a rare event in itself. Luckily, the owners of the cabin next door were out of town and offered to let us use it.

To exacerbate the situation, Christmas Eve brought the onset of a nasty stomach bug that ended up raging through almost the whole family. From Christmas Eve until New Years, there was at least one family member praying to the porcelain god. As you can imagine, close quarters, seven young kids, and a stomach flu mixed in makes for some tension and chaos. During that time I was very grateful that we were as close and loving of a family as we are....... whoever didn't have the bug at the time served the ones who did, rode herd on the kids, cooked, etc. And the favor was repaid when the roles were reversed. We all had our less than pleasant moments, but it was a good reminder of what a great family I have- and really it reflected what Christmas is all about....Sacrifice.

So this Christmas will go down in the annals of our family holidays. And, of course, everyone knew it would get blogged about! :)

Christmas traditions........ Hoedowns.....

Picking...

Grinning....

Laughing....

Dancing...

And even a little "homemade" mountain liquid refreshment filled the evenings

at my parents annual Christmas jams. All their old-time musician friends came down from the mountains and hollers and gathered at my parents log home for an evening of playing Appalachian music around the stone hearth......fires lit, hearts warm. Even us young 'uns enjoyed the evenings, dancing and singing along. One tradition I love and miss now that I am far from home.....

Raking Leaves...... we still haven't finished raking all the leaves from our yard and it is now December. We have the only yard on the block with trees, so we feel the neighborly duty to rake so the leaves don't blow into everyone's yard. But we tend to rake up one bagful here, one bagful there. And we get plenty of "help"- the kind of help that makes it "one step forward, one step back". But that's the best kind, isn't it?

ANNE LOUGH......

For those who love traditional Appalachian music, or who know people who do, I want to introduce you to Anne Lough...... also known as "Mom". Yes, I am blessed to have a wonderful musician as a mother and grew up with a childhood full of music...........

My mom has several wonderful albums..... I am currently listening to "Leading of the Star", her instrumental Christmas album. She teamed up with her friend, Karin Lyle, who plays harp, and the album is made up of traditional Christmas carols and hymns on hammered and lap dulcimer, and harp. It's the one Christmas album I allow myself to start playing before Christmas because it is so beautiful and relaxing. A great CD to play on a cold, dark winter's night.

She will also have a new traditional album coming out soon with friends who play banjo and fiddle. I'll post about that when it is released. To check out all her recordings, go here. Then you can click on the "recordings" link. Any of the CD's would make a good gift for friends or family who love traditional Appalachian music. My mom specializes in the old mountain ballads and folk songs, so don't expect bluegrass music (just wanted to put in that disclaimer). I think she is one of the best dulcimer and traditional artists out there- but, of course, I could be a little biased :) . So go check out her site and tell her I sent you!

MAKING PIES.................

























Pumpkin pie is Sir Laughsalot's FAVORITE kind of pie. I think he would eat a whole one if I let him. This year he wanted to make one from scratch. And not from the can, scratch.......fom a pumpkin. He begged and begged at Halloween to make one from our Jack-o-lanterns innards, but I explained that you had to use a special kind of pie pumpkin and we would make one for Thanksgiving. And, of course, I saw plenty of pie pumpkins for sale during October, but when we tried to find one for Thanksgiving, none could be found. We tried farmer's markets, fruit stands, grocery stores, etc. to no avail. I held out until Thanksgiving Eve and went to one last grocery store, but no luck!!! So Sir Laughsalot, much to his disappointment, had to make one from canned pumpkin. We actually made two, one to share and one to have all to himself! :) He was a very good pie maker and was very excited about the outcome, as you can see. I also learned that next year, we need to buy the pie pumpkin early. Any tips on preserving it until Thanksgiving time? Or any advice on where to get a pie pumpkin closer to Thanksgiving?

The B. Street Band.........

Here's some summer photos of sir laughsalot and his neighborhood buddies doing some pickin' and grinnin' of their own. The girls' dad and I were practicing on our front porch and the kids decided to start up their own band. They even put a hat out for passersby to drop a coin in. I guess you can't start too young!

Well, we got bit last night from the first stomach bug of the season. Needless to say, Sir Laughsalot was not laughing as he managed to utter, "This is the worst day EVER!" as he leaned over the toilet. So today will be laundry day, washing the pile of clothes, sheets, and towels from the nights foray. And enduring the gurgly stomach in anticipation of it getting passed along..... ahhh..... the joys of motherhood!!

TRICK-OR-TREAT NIGHT

(as you can see... sir laughsalot didn't stray far for halloween dress)

1. fighting a dastardly pirate

2. boys just wanna have fun!

3. pets on parade

I'd Like You To Meet.......

SIR LAUGHSALOT......

Don't let the armor and weaponry scare you.... he's really a rather cheerful bloke and only fights monsters, bad guys, and Sadaam Hussein.

Sir Laughsalot has a long history of cheerfulness and was, in fact, born smiling. Some say it's just gas, but I like to believe otherwise.

Sir Laughsalot can be worked up into hysterics with just the slightest provocation........for

example,

reading funny books. He's even been known to cackle in his sleep.......no nightmares for this brave knight.

"A merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance..." Proverbs 15:13